Jan 22, 2011

Feelings !

I watched "Mother India " today and after 25 years,it still holds its stand in my heart.I love this movie and to me it is a legend.

Iam not a fan of old movies coz I find the acting mechanised rather than being natural.To me when I watch a movie,good acting is when I feel it and would make the remark," yeah! I guess I would have felt or done the same".Now commercial movies are a totally different thing.They are meant for pure entertainment,nothing to think about.

What I love about the movie is the attachment the mother has with her boys.How she knows their weakness and strengths,good habits and bad ones but loves them blindly.The fact that she went through all that length to save her younger one from making a mistake but failed.Her yearning for him to come back to her and her promise to make all things better for them.That always hits that crying spot in my heart.

I hate that obnoxious remark people make," Jab tum Ma banogi tho tumhe pata chalega ki bache kya cheez hothe hai,ma banna kya hota hai".
I have come across many a women and am sure will come to see many more who say,we just havent handled children at all before we got married.Who on earth says that? When I watch these hollywood movies,the working women are portrayed as people who hold a child as if holding a nuclear missile.How can that be.How mechanical has ones life been before he loses all natural instincts or responses.

I have never seen my sister hold,pamper or do anything with a child all her life.She didnt go all mush on them when she saw babies unlike me ,like my father put it,"Tekkha le rakha hai duniya ke bache sambhalna ka."But she is a mom now and everything has come into place.The maternal instincts kicked in long back but now she materialises them with her kid.I know every woman gets her maternal instincts kicked in at some point but a 28 yr old woman saying,I had no idea what to do until I had my own.Cant get it ! If anyone has an idea,do explain it to me.

Anyways,back to Nargis.An amazing actress.She was beautiful and a good and decent actress.A woman didnt have to shed so much of her clothing to act well and now there is no contour or curve left undiscovered of an actress in any movie.Sad really ! But still there are a few who still ,thanks heaven, act well.

Who is a good mother ?
Is it a woman who doesnt give up easily on her kids or family?
Is it a woman who slogs day and night to rear her children ?
Is it a woman who teaches her children to be true to their self and the world?

Who is a good mother?

I would like people who read this question at least,if not my boring blog entry,and tell me what they think a good mother is.No quotes,no cliche' answers,no filmy dialogue.Honest ones as to what they thought of their own mom and the way they were brought up.

Jan 13, 2011

The difficulty of being entertained...

My husband put this question forward and slept with this angry face....What do you keep thinking all the time?

Now why was he angry,its because hes worried my blood pressure will sky rocket again.I understand his concern but I cant help thinking.He says I dwell too much over things.I was programmed to do so ever since I had brothers and sisters.Before I was carefree,then it was "not you now..they are younger,,let them have it first.You're a grown up now".AFter that it was tension....they look upto you...behave well,behave like a human being..and so on and so forth.

Anyways,Im not always tensed when Im in my own dreamy world.I may be thinking,if I had license ,I would be at the beach,listening to my Ipod and enjoying the waves and tides. Or I maybe thinking if I had been to that Ming restaurant, How I would love those fried noodles. Or maybe Im wondering if I had that cash right now,I would buy a bunch of tops to go with my jeans.Or maybe that outfit would make me look smoking hot,but sad...cannot wear it and go out in public. Or maybe I would look fabulous dancing like on the beach or in the garden.It could be many things.Wish I could go to Egypt and visit those museums.Or I could be like that chick in the movie "THe Mummy".

Im tensed when things dont go my way,like I tell my hubby I want to sit at the beach and he makes this face which reads "I work by those damn waters for 8 hours at a time and now I have to go there and listen to it again and then go for work for another repetition." He is one surprising person who ahtes the beach, who hates malls,who hates places where there are more than 10 people,hates places where we can play or ride stuff.He would rather spend time with his buddies in a tiny room where they can smoke and choke on it.

Even though Opposites attract,it can be a real pain at times.Im a total extrovert and he's the opposite,the baap of all introverts.Im a chatterbox and he can sit still without opening his mouth,putting the still objects to shame at times.Our pairing works actually,coz in places where he lacks in,I do good and where I lack in,he covers it for me.

The weekend is here and none of my friends have called.Sister is waiitng for her delivery day after tomorrow and my mom is hovering over her for all her needs.Brother is on a jolly go ride  wondering what pregger land has he been thrown into.

Expecting a friend to land here soon.She has 3 kids and then our gang will comprise of 4 men,4 women and 7 kids. Whoa.....its gonna be cumbersome going out with 7 screaming banshees.heheheheh:> .

I just read my friend Sujatha's blog just now.Yeah..its true,we love to keep our homes spotless but in the end keep our outsides (beyond our doors) very dirty.I do my bit like her by keeping things even outside neat and clean.I dont litter myself that much coz I feel guilty.I have come to believe that If I keep my surroundings dirty now,there will a time I may be surrounded with crap in this world and next.My husband annoys me at times,purposely throwing things out the window or the moving car.He knows I get pissed off.Lekin har kaam ka shubh aarambh apne dil se start hota hai aur phir bahar continue rehti hai.

Thats strange, its 4:30 pm and the sun hasnt set yet.Why! Chalo...I applied masala to some fish pieces and fish eggs.Have to cook chana pulao  for tomorrow.Dont wanna get up on a holiday and spend hours cooking and cleaning and doing the same ol' mundane stuff.The weekend should be a bit different.

Gotta wake my sleepy head hubby and make tea for him.Time for tea and biscuits.Queen Elizabeth would be so proud to know that 500+ years later,we Indians have adapted her Majesty's habit.

Feel free to comment.This goes to people who read and comment freely and those who read and shy away from making themselves known.This blog is to take out mere bade dil ki badhass.....tho it can have crap in it or something intelligent.But I like to have a connection with my readers.

Jan 9, 2011

The curse of hopelessness..

I watched this movie "The Duchess " starring Keira Knightley and Ralph Fiennes.The movie was very good and I love british movies depicting their past.This is a true story though and a sad one at that.

To live in a loveless marriage,to give up love for someone you really dont care a damn for,to live  a life which is basically a facade.I actually felt for the main character who happens to be the Duchess in the movie.She watches her husband fathering children with maids,having affairs,even keeping a mistress in the same house.And his justification being,"I promised you a marriage with everything and In return all I ask for is a male heir and loyalty without fail."

She does give him a son after being raped by him,which then gives her this break from keeping up appearances of being loyal to his face.She lives an unhappy life seeking refuge in the laughter of her children.SHe bears him 2 girls and a boy,brings up a maid's daughter as her own as well and lives as friends with the mistress and her kids.

I think she had a big heart.Even though she is rich beyond her means,she preferred being a hands on mom.SHe loved her daughters to bits,even though the father showed no interest in them coz they were female.SHe forgave the mistress who was initially her best friend and lived with her her till her death.

Another issue that captured my mind was even in a british society,or the so called western generation, a male child was worth more than a female.A woman meant nothing if she didnt bear a son.Imagine what a barren woman would have to go through.Actually I did look up and she was considered a nothing in any named class of people,be it rich or poor.It is so sad,but a male child ,I think,meant an assurance for the parents who when grew old needed help.So the more ,the merrier.

Anyways,Im glad for not been born back then.The old ages.

Thats the reason I love these movies.An insight into their culture or it could be any movie with english subtitles and as long as it remained true to itself,I would love watching it.Books are a great alternative but then again when you are able to see something,you dont ponder too much and go slow.When I read a book,I hate taking breaks and disturbances.I have to get into the mood and thus be able to run my imagination wild and undisturbed.It usually when Im completely relaxed,people will be calling up or I will suddenly remember some chore or my husband will start talking.We usually wont utter a syllable for an hours and then when something I love comes on,my hubby will start talking about some thing and I will go in mind," R u freakin kiddin me...Mehmood plz lambi bath na karna!" But then since we dont yak that much,I just give up and join in in his yakking.

Iam sure it happens to many of you guys as well.Do write in names of movies which you think is sort of an eye opener to what our society is truly like or how it used to be.Chandi Bar,Allah ke Bandey,Khuda ke liye,etc. were some such movies I truly loved.

Jan 2, 2011

Are we living it just right?

Many a times,most of us,live a life risk free.Everything is pre thought for us in advance by our parents or dictated by peers or friends.We always take a risk in an area we know someone else has taken one in a while ago.Many of us dont dive into something head on without giving a second thought.I sometimes wonder how that life must be.Is it exciting? Is it filled with curiosity and thus there is no room for any boredom?

You know,the most exciting thing Im gonna do tomorrow and I have no idea how I will do so,I have to fill a 2.5L can with urine.I have to collect and pour in pee all day.

The only risk filled thing I did was ,elope with my husband and get married.Oh yeah,I have done some more few things but which hot blooded teenager doesnt.

I think as we grow old,we become more and more aware and conscious of each and everything and everyone.We like being safe,take very few chances coz now we have kids and families that we cant run away from anymore.I keep telling my husband ,we should try being a little adventurous,like maybe going into the middle of the cold desert and perhaps having tea.I know what Sujatha is thinking,but I guess that phase has been outgrown.I just like to think that I did something different,something totally stupid.Awesome would be sky diving or rafting.Dont have the energy or the health to do stuff like that anymore.

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