Yesterday I experienced a moonlit night in the proper sense. I reside in the middle east, so stars and proper darkness is something we never have around us. There were days on end when I would look out my window and wonder what a star-filled night sky really looked like.
“Tears, idle tears, I know not what they mean,
Tears from the depths of some divine despair
Rise in the heart, and gather to the eyes,
In looking on the happy autumn fields,
And thinking of the days that are no more.”
―
A couple of years ago, there was a mention of shooting stars which could be seen ona certain date. So my husband and I left for what seemed like an eternity somewhere close to the border of Saudi Arabia I guess. There were a few scattered camps around and after a certain distance, the complete absence of street lights and then total darkness. We both were just shocked, yes shocked is the word, coz I had never seen these many stars in my entire life. It looked like stars had been sprinkled in excess in the sky that day. I wish we had better cameras because my mobile just couldn't capture the jaw-dropping awesomeness that is nature that day.
My habit of wandering off the topic is still there. So where were we, a moonlit night.
We were in this new locality that has no electricity yet and is being built as of last year. once we stopped our car and my eyes really took a while to adjust to the darkness. And then in total darkness, there was light. I could see the entire street, the half-finished homes, the tents, the building materials laid across the entire city and a sky filled with a few more stars than usual.
At the most, we can see just 4-6 stars most of the time, but I got to see up to 25..which according to me is a big deal. It wasn't full moon yet but you could not deny the glory that even half a moon can be.
It took me back to 1995. When we walked along the rice fields at night for new year mass. My granny as against us going for mass in the night but a group of youngsters would go together and come back by 11pm. It was amazing! There were no street lights back then and we took a short cut along paddy field and sugar cane fields to reach the church located uphill, rather a single church on the top of a small hill.
SO we would walk in complete darkness with just the moonlight guiding our path. Neither did we slip anywhere nor faltered along the way. The smell of wet mud in the paddy fields, the smell of the various plants, a very old banyan tree stump, which my friends say was haunted, the feel of soft clay like paths under our feet. Yes, I walked barefoot. I love to walk barefoot, feel the grass, the sand, the mud, the rock. You feel connected. The laughter between us cousins, the giggles...I cannot ever forget those moments. SOmething out of a Miyazaki animation, feel connected to nature, feel connected to your roots.
After about 35 mins of walking, we crossed the street and walked up to a steep hill to the church. I did appreciate the natural beauty I was surrounded by 24/7 during our brief stays but I had no camera to capture the moment. Maybe that's why it is like this 1080p movie in mind. I feel at peace whenever I start screening it in my mind.
Just one simple moonlit night, brought on a rush of so many memories. That I was smiling in my sleep. How life has changed over the years. That endless laughter, those tight giggles... they all have been replaced by so-called acceptable maturity. It's not that I don't laugh but that was a burst of laughter that emitted from my heart and touched my soul. It's hard to come by out-front anything nowadays. You are friends with many people but still, feel alone in that moment when small joys come their way.
“The sight of a child…will arouse certain longings in adult, civilized persons — longings which relate to the unfulfilled desires and needs of those parts of the personality which have been blotted out of the total picture in favor of the adapted persona.”
―
“A thousand moments lost because you took them for granted, just because you expected a thousand more.”
―
Love yourself. Don't lock yourself in TikTok videos and silly stupid youtube or Snapchat traps. Explore...Entreat yourself to holidays where you rediscover yourself your strengths and weaknesses and give yourself a chance to work on it.
“I think the only answer is to live life to the fullest while you can and collect memories like fools collect money. Because in the end, that's all you have - happy memories.”
―
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