Dec 26, 2010

2011 resolution - 1

Christmas this year again was another flop event.Neither I was invited nor my family came to my place to meet with me.

They used to moments to look forward to some time ago but now gradually its becoming that festival which isnt my own anymore coz when you dont celebrate it,its just another holiday.

New year is on the horizon and Im thinking about resolutions.These are things which i will laugh 6 months down the lane over coz they will seem impossible to accomplish and therefore,ridiculous to think about.But a few have to be kept coz my life (health) will depend on it.

First being - SALT.I vow to use less salt in my food.No matter how bad it tastes,I will have to do it.

Second being _ STRESS.I vow to learn how to keep my stress under control which will in turn help me mind and body wise.I fret a lot over my family issues.That is the family thats there and gives me a headache and a family that hasnt been there at all and gives me all the more headache.

Third being - WEIGHT.I vow to control my sweet teeth set and eating habits.I will keep a little of tummy less filled.Lets see,the Japs(Japani) are always right.Even in Islam its said,leaving your tummy a little less hungry is good for health and long life.

Fourth is - GIVING THANKS.I vow to be grateful for the blessings in my life,for the people in my life and for the things in my life.I will try to thank all those who help me in every possible way,knowingly or unknowingly.I will pray without fail every night.

I vow not to treat someone indiferently eventhough they do the same to me.I dont care what people think but I do care what God has to say about this.Since I believe what goes around ,comes around.I do good and at some point it will come back to me.

Just as I was beginning to wonder if we both ( my husband and I) were having the 7 year itch or rather 8 year itch,we both went through this illness thingy and came out of it with flying colors,realising that we indeed were meant for each other and finally have a whole new respect for one another.Unlike my mom who thinks that Iam under a spell of black magic done by my husband,I really think God blessed me with the perfect man.I wouldnt have been happier elsewhere with anyone else.I guess standing up for my  thoughts paid off well.

There's an interesting movie on the telly and I guess I will stop for now and keep updating later on.

Dec 23, 2010

Dec 2010 - 1

Another year has come to an end and at this point I dont know how I feel to put behind 33 years of my life.

I went for some bird shopping and plant shopping today.The beautiful singing birds are so damn expensive and then couldnt go for plant hunting.I was so tired in the end but I walked for almost an hour today.Which is a big deal since I came out of the hospital.

I saw amazing birds and cute rabbits dressed in dresses and tiny outfits.I saw persian cats and cute shaggy dogs.I saw african parrots ,one of which made sounds like a monkey,whistled,made laughing noises and it seemed as if it was trying to impress us.If i only had the money to afford it.It cost upto 50 grand.

Another Christmas is going to pass by and I again will not have a chance to celebrate it.I was looking forward to having one but it became a flop show idea.Looking forward to going to the beach to have a one on one time with the sun.It gets dark by 4pm and it seems like night fall by 6 and miss the sunsets.

Dec 15, 2010


It all started with a stomach ache and gas trouble.I tried every remedy known to me but then something else was wrong too.I had trouble collecting my breath and then one evening all hell went loose and I satrted having chest pains.We went for a routine check up at the hospital and after about 40 minutes,when my turn had finally come,my Blood pressure(BP) was a 200/130.They immediately took me to the emergency room ,had an ECG done,gave me meds to lower my blood pressure which refused to go down inspite of all meds and finally I was admitted in the hospital.

The next 5 days were a nightmare for me coz the 2 times I went into severe chest pain,I thought that this was it and I was going to die.I recited my last prayers both these times and worried that I wouldnt be able to tell my husband the few words I wanted to.The meds I had taken,some family tensions and the sadness at times were overwhelming I guess and they all just came into action with this.

But it was later on I realised a few life lessons.I wasnt invincible,I had to die the time God intended it to happen and How precious taking care of our body and mind was.I realised again for the hundreth time,that I had made no mistake in marrying my husband even though my family hasnt approved of him in 9 years.I also learnt that in calming my mind,I brought peace to my heart literally and emotionally.

My heart broke into a gazillion pieces when i saw my husband turn white with horror when I had my second and third pains.

But then when my BP wasnt going down no matter what,my doctors and nurses realised that I was too attached to my home(husband) and no way was I going to get well in the hospital.They discharged me 2 days ago even though I had 169/108.Now in just 2 days my BP has lowered down to 150/100.And today it was a bit lower than this but maybe it was my medications working well along with the happiness and joy of coming back home.Hopefully ,I will return back to normal soon.I have many doctor trips ensured for a long time and lots of tests and saltless recipes to endure.But its okay.Im just glad to be home.

When I revisited my doctor,he was glad to see some color on my face and relieved he hadnt made a mistake in sending me home with high BP.

SO this has been one of the many life lessons for me.And hopefully I will never forget these lessons.In a way,If I hadnt had trouble breathing,I wouldnt have gone to the hospital and wouldnt have known how dangerously close I was to hurting myself or may have some life threatening problems.God does all things for a reason and Im thankful for this experience.Truly from my heart.It maybe difficult to see optimism at times like these but once you have got to that place of peace,it isnt that difficult.

My reason for blogging this is not to earn sympathy but Im trying in a way to convey,that everything happens for a reason and one shouldnt lose faith or hope.Live life well and respect it while you have it.

Im much better now.My husband hasnt allowed me to be active in any form,so Im lazing around.I have been advised bed rest for a month or at least till my BP returns to normal.But I feel Im getting better already.The food is a little difficult.To quit salt cold turkey is very difficult.But I guess i will do anything just to see that smile on my husband's face.My friends have been a constant support.Not sure if I can handle all this pampering.I scared the crap out of my 9 month pregnant sister.Everytime I switch the fan on or sigh,people immediately look at me.I have eaten a whole lot of oranges and fruits and right now I have to pee all the salt and toxins out of my body as a much as a I can.Im learning to care for that ONe organ that does so many things from Love to life.Wish me luck.

People ask me what were your symptoms.I think its good to give out some information.When my BP shot off,I had pain my arms,shoulders and teeth.I had severe headaches and of course pain in my chest.I didnt sweat that much this time and I turned bright red in color.Even my ears turned red and my body got heated up.When you find it difficult to breathe,sleep on your left hand side.And take deep breaths.I usually have severe panic attacks when im worried and in pain.During panic attacks,your breathing gets shallow and only your pulse shoots up.I think.Look up.Even epigastric pains can be painful.

Anyways,Im done for now,I feel tired.

Oct 16, 2010

If I had a 24 hours to live....

I will not hide the fact that I copied this topic from my friend's blog,Sujatha satya. Sorry Suji,but its great topic.

It reminded me of this Queen Latifa film in which she is told she has a few months to live and her mistaken MRI report,sets her off on this dream she wanted to live before she died.In the movie,its going to the salon and having a makeover of her face.Cosmetics wise that is.SHe goes to a haute couture store and buys some of the fine outfits that make her look like a hot femme fatale.By the way,I admire the fact she respects her body and loves it for being plus size.She is an inspiration to me.I dont yearn to look skinny but have always loved my flubber blubber body.I did want to have a thin frame alright but its just not in my genes.So I do love what I have.

Now if I found out I had 24 hours to live,what would I do?

I probably would cry for a solid 30 minutes because I didnt want to die at all.I would curse everything around and if it turned out that it was because of my own doing,like poor diet or an health issue which I could have taken care but was lazy too,I would cry harder.If it was cancer or some disease which took over and then ,after crying for 30 mins,I would finally accept my fate and do what I wanted to do.

Taking my husband to India would be a difficult task,so most probably I would do that alone.I would go for a few hours,meet my folks,reconcile,tell my good byes and come back straight to kuwait.

In the meantime,when tickets are being booked,I would go to a wonderful restaurant with my husband,eat cake and eat to glory some of my favourite dishes.

I would book a suite in the best hotel and make passionate love to my husband one last time and cry with him.All this would take almost 2 hours by which time,I would go to india,meet my folks for 2 hours and take the next flight back to kuwait within the hour.

By the time Im back,I will have my sister and brother invited with all my friends to my favourite beach spot,where I will have arranged a fantastic banquet for all and we will eat,say my good byes,kiss all of them,wish them my heartiest.

I would shop at the best spot and buy that one outfit which makes me look like a goddess and have my hubby dress in a suit.I would tell everyone to leave us alone and go to the beach with my hubby where I will tell him all what I want to.I will command him to grieve for a few months for me before he decides to remarry.I will hug him and kiss him and ask him to hold me tight and not let go.

There will be a lot of crying,unbelivable crying from my side especially and I would discuss my funeral too.I would want a tree to be planted over my grave or by the side of it.

During this whole time,I would click 1000s of pictures and tell my husband to keep them as memories forever.

In the evening,with few hours left,I would not entertain anyone else,I would return to my home and sleep by my husband's side and ask him to hold me and tell me I love you a gazillion times until I breathe my last.

I would pray too for forgiveness of sins and say my last prayers but would still want to leave this world hearing an I love you in my ear from my husband.

Talking about death is painful for me.I have seen a man ,in his mid 20s,dying.He prayed hard,he read the bible continuously,he cried and prayed for strength.But then the day,we went to meet him,he saw my dad and completely broke down.He was in pain and most of all I saw fear in his eyes.He cried loudly saying he didnt want to die.It was too much for me to handle and he died a few weeks after that.I think he was 24 at the most and I was 19 back then.I thought to myself,he shouldnt have known about his illness,maybe then he would die in peace.

I had an aunt who died of uterine cancer.A beautiful healthy woman,who didnt know about her cancer.By the time,she was diagnosed of final stage of cancer,she had lost over 50 kg weight within a couple of months.She wasnt informed till the very last if Im not mistaken and she spoke of getting better soon.She too died a few days after I last saw her.That too was just too much to handle for me.I was 14 or maybe 15.

Its hard to come to terms with death and my hubby says one should fear death because it is the only thing that makes us all humble and know we are after God's creation,come from dust and to be returned to dust.

I always think to myself,that in the last moment ,I have enough time to say my good byes and love yous and be able to say my last prayer and die with dignity.

I wrote all this in 10 minutes without blinking I think.

Oct 11, 2010

In the future for me...

I recently had been on a mini shopping spree with my brother.The smallest of the Fernandes clan and the last existent bachelor I know of.No ,I have 3 more cousin bros to tie the knot.The mini spree was anything but mini and my brother is anything but small.hehheheh.....

Jokes apart,my brother is tying the knot very soon,in a month's time.Im happy for him and kind of full of anxiety.Though its all as per he wanted...he is my youngest brother and to me ,he is still that big eyed baby in diapers.To think within a few years ,he will be changing stinky diapers of his own progeny...its a bit hard to imagine.

What is making this whole experience of seeing him preparing himself to be "imprisoned for life",is to see him grow as a man...a man who is complete..who is honest and loving.Hard working and maybe romantic.The most romantic thing he did for his siters...was make eggs on sunday for breakfast.And he was damn good at it.

My sister is on the verge of entering her 3rd trimester and I just cant wait to see the first by-product of the Rodrigues and Fernandes clan.Its a "he" and He has already been named "Nathan".She is preparing herself for motherhood by avoiding sweets with little success and sleeping whenever she can find the time.

SO there are 2 great things happening within the next 6 months.My brother will be married and my sister will have a boy by the second week of January.

Im still smiling,still growing fat....still blogging and waiting for people to write in their blogs.

Oct 1, 2010

Friday chats.

I have lately installed DishTV,and It has got me completely hooked.So many interesting things to watch,silly things,useless things,wise things,interesting things and things full of knowledge.I don't get bored and so far,I'm 3 weeks into it.Bollywood gupshup and new songs and new movies and all things of discovery and national geographic.I love it,even the ads are having an effect on me.
There's this ad which caught my fancy,which was with age,skin gets dry.I don't even remember what cream its advertising actually but the dry skin thing got me.I started using moisturisers a year ago.Staying indoors with A/C 24/7 can dry up your skin easily but then ,since we aren't getting any younger,I started my routine.I wash my face and immediately put on a moisturiser.It works wonders actually,I have never had such good skin.I do have my moles and beauty spots all over my face but that's a part of me.But the basic skin has shown tremendous improvement.Allowing our skin to sweat is very good too.We do all we can to avoid sweating.But actually its very healthy to sweat and let all those toxins ooze out.

I sweat very easily.And I sweat in places ,where most people don't sweat in.I'm not going to mention them,its very "Eee...ww" to say but I guess many people will secretly identify with me.

I watched "Dabangg".And i loved it.I found Salman extremely hot In his khaki uniform and his killer chashma.The movie is okay,most o the action sequences inspired from top action Hollywood movies like transporter 1&2 and many more.but to watch one time its good.I ,at first didn't like "munni badnaam hui" song, but I'm humming it all the time and I love the part where Salman dances the steps with Malaika.

Coming to Malaika,I haven't seen anyone with such bony ass in my life.Its like the lower back and ass are not muscles but one huge fused bone.I hate her figure.She's too anorexic for my taste.Rakhi Sawant has a better bod than her but the best leading figures are Mallika Sherawat and Shilpa Shetty.There should be some flesh in the ass.I could spare a Kg and a half of mine with anyone who lacks one.

Today,my Jaanu is going to cook dinner.He bought some desis red potatoes and brinjals and hes going to cook baingan-aloo.I don't like the dish at all.But I'm not fussy in terms of food.I will eat anything even if it sucks or not my kind.My Jaanu refuses to agree to that,but no..I'm not fussy.

I just friend some chicken wings for us for tea.Yeah ! He's like who eats fried stuff with tea.I was like,want to eat one can eat sugar infused biscuits,why not deep fried buffalo wings.I knew ,he couldn't resist it.They were so well fried...and tender that they broke apart when tugged on lightly.He ate 4,I had 5.One should have a variety.If not in bed,then maybe at( not On) the dinner table.;>

You know what I feel like doing right about now,wearing green eye shadow and going out.but with hubby at work and me all alone.I guess....will do the dishes and do the laundry.We wear so many clothes and change so many times.I guess I'm addicted to washing.

Sep 27, 2010

Back !

I watched "I hate Love stories" yesterday and wasn't as impressed as I

thought I would be.As the movie states,too many movies have been made
based on love stories,so we are familiar with every angle and nothing
innovative can be thought of or nothing different happens out there
to be made into a movie anymore.Good girls are attracted to bad boys
and bad boys are attracted to good ones.

I just realised,like the many others who did so too,that falling in
love is something everyone dreams of but few have their prayers
answered.Most of us don't even realise for a long time,that it was
just infatuation and not love.And many of us just dont recognise the '
evil in the opposite sex,who merely want to have fun and will make
you believe in the impossible to get you to do things to them.But
every girl and boy do try it.They may fall for their cousins or
neighbours or friends.Just for the experience of what it really feels
like.I do feel sad for the one didn't get to fall for someone.not that
arranged marriage doesn't give you that option.But falling in love
teaches you possessiveness,makes you bold and most of all introduces
you to something other than parental love and sibling love hood.

Today I plan on watching "Dabangg".

Right now I'm watching Tamil songs.These songs are so colourful and
have such great music.I don't understand a single alphabet of tamil
but somehow I think the music is great,catchy and you literally want
to break into a dance.The ghagra n cholis,the flowers on your
hair,simple bindis and saris,Wow !

I actually see too much of western clothing here and fashion ,that at
least I,want to see something traditional.One isn't hip if not wearing
jeans or those skimpy outfits.I felt the same as a teen.But now I
just am tired of seeing everything western.Even modern saris aren't
saris anymore.The blouses are substituted by bikinis tops or padded
bras.The waist exposed in the saris ....aayoooo...Its starts from way
below the belly button and ends just below the boob fold.What the
hell is that? I know a woman feels ,if she has the body for it then
why not! Maybe it depends on the society they live in or .....I
wouldn't want my daughter to flaunt herself like that or any man
expecting certain decency and public respect would want it.

I actually have heard men say they love when other men look at their
wives and slobber all over them.I don't get such men,but if anyone has
any ideas,do mention them in your comment.

See from to where I skip topics wise.This is actually how my mind,its
full of questions ,one not relating to another! I want to write about
North Korea and parasitic invasion in the human body or elephant
anecdotes.I want to write about trying on green eye shadow the next
time I go out.I want to mention that I have been dreaming of applying
dark eyeliner and kajal and going out.I want to ask if I would look nice if I went in for more blond highlights and lighten my eye brows.

Ooh these tamil actors and actresses are fantastic dancers.How they move with the tiniest beats in the songs.Wow....Some "ethi ethi...mathi mathi" song I think sung by A.R.Rahman.Now its"nalandana",some tamil hip hop!!!!!Now I would love to be a playback dancer for these songs.If I was the age and had the body for it.Now I'm all out of shape.

Sep 15, 2010

We girls..

Reading my friend's blog on her fear about a blooming friendship at school,I just thought I could have a little more to comment than a few lines offered at the comment post.

I think when everyone has a daughter,along with knowing they will have someone who will love them and do more than a son i.e. until she gets married.I mean she will cook,help at home,take care of her parent's personal need and will be more expressive and appreciative.

There is this constant fear about her when you learn your daughter isnt a child anymore.

Parents adopt many different attitudes,angles ,actions when raising their child.Everyone wants a child who respects,studys well,is a good person,gets through life well and does well for themselves.Some take a strict approach and some are pretty linient with their kid.SOme are over protective and dont let their child take any chances fearing the worst while some just laugh saying they are the ones who will have to do all on their own,so no age is too young.But I have realised one thing,there is no perfect lesson to teach.Hover over them but give them space.Be open about everything but know your kids will never be a 100% honest with you about everything.And when raising your child remember,too much of everything is not good,be it nice or bad.You too were once a child and a teen,so dont act as if you came out of your mother's womb with all knowledge of life at age 25.Let your child make a mistake and learn ways of explaining their mistakes to them.Beating your child to show they were wrong is not wrong,beating them senseless or for no reason is.

When I was 15 and years after that,I loved to flirt,didnt fool around as such but yes i loved getting attention.But then came my sister,growing up into this cute girl and the day she satrted applying lipstick to college,I started worrying.I would wonder what if some guy found her cute,what if some guy "line marofied" her,what if she fell in love,what if????? Even though I knew it was my parent's job and not mine,I felt so responsible coz i was in charge of them.We women are such nutjobs,thinking we hold the weight of the world on our shoulders.If she came in late,I worried.Sleepless nights and I wondered how and what should be done,so that she is honest with me,trusts me enough to tell me everything.

I tried being strict which led to successful literal slapping and bitch slapping.Doors being banged to the extent they would fall off,screaming to the heights that one would burst their voice box,crying away to the point when the oceans felt as small as ponds and worrying to the dawn of panic attacks and mini heart attacks.The grotto at the church became a confession and begging for some sort of redemption point.The thing is running away felt like the best option.

Then came the day with a good friend's intervention,things smoothened up and finally we both got a breakthrough.and to date I think we can be honest and frank about many things without the tacky emotions coming in between.

I finally realised and learnt,that by giving both of my siblings space and understanding,freedom of expression and actions,it led them to see things from their own perspective.Of course,My daily dose of experiences of my life and that of others around me and some advice didnt go waste.

Setting a good example is important too.I cannot be boozing away,dancing in clubs,wearing skimpy stuff and expect my kids to grow into saints.Teaching your kids at a young age about things,introducing them to reality,one bit at a time is a great way to ease them into this world.Being open about sex and the bad wrold out there is considered a sort of a taboo even now and sort of frowned upon by our elders.Children not only mimic their parents but they mimic the television and everyone else they see all day.Everyone has a share in influencing one self.So if its true for adults,its definitely true for kids.

To Sujatha's question,Should we fear for our kids ,seeing what the world is going to! Yes,we should.What kind of people would we be if we didnt worry for our loved ones.Or think about them.It is but natural to fret over over things we love and what if that is a part of us.So it might be needless fear but without that fear,our kids would one day freak out if we told them we really didnt care enough to at list mentally torture ourself.After all its not fear ,its love.

Sep 4, 2010

What my birthday means !

My maiden name was Suzaan Sandra Fernandes.My name now is still the same but Im called Aishah by friends.

Meanings of my names :-

Suzaan: Lily variant of the hebrew name Susan ,Its of african/Dutch origin,In the apocryphal Book of Tobit Susannah courageously defended herself against wrongful accusation. White lilies grew in the Biblical city of Susa in Persia.

Sandra : God's helper. Helper of mankind. Short form of Alexandra.

Fernandes : is a family name of portugese or spanish origin.

Aishah : is a variant of Aisha (Arabic), and the meaning of Aishah is "alive and well". Also,Womanly / lively / life .

Your birth tree is   Weeping Willow, the Melancholy

Beautiful but full of melancholy, attractive, very empathic, loves anything beautiful and tasteful, loves to travel, dreamer, restless, capricious, honest, can be influenced but is not easy to live with, demanding, good intuition, suffers in love but finds sometimes an anchoring partner.
The moon's phase on the day you were born was waning gibbous.

Your birth flower is ASTER.

Your birthstone is Sapphire .

The Mystical properties of Sapphire

Though not meant to replace traditional medical treatment, Sapphire is used for clear thinking.

Some lists consider these stones to be your birthstone. (Birthstone lists come from Jewelers, Tibet, Ayurvedic Indian medicine, and other sources)

Agate, Moonstone, Lapis Lazuli

Top songs of 1977

How Deep Is Your Love by Bee Gees
Star Wars Theme/Cantina Band by Meco

You were born in the Chinese year of the Snake.
The Year Of The Snake 1917, 1929, 1941, 1953, 1965, 1977, 1989, 2001

People born in the Year of the Snake are deep. They say little and possess great wisdom. They never have to worry about money; they are financially fortunate. Snake people are often quite vain, selfish, and a bit stingy. Yet they have tremendous sympathy for others and try to help those less fortunate. Snake people tend to overdo, since they have doubts about other people's judgment and prefer to rely on themselves. They are determined in whatever they do and hate to fail. Although calm on the surface, they are intense and passionate. Snake people are usually good-looking and sometimes have marital problems because they are fickle.

Your Native American Zodiac sign is Bear; your plant is Violets.

You were born in the Egyptian month of Hathys, the third month of the season of Poret (Emergence - Fertile soil).

The Hijra (Islamic Calendar) date of your birth is Sunday, 20 Ramadan 1397 (1397-9-20).

Your date of conception was on or about 12 December 1976 which was a Sunday.
You were born on a Sunday under the astrological sign Virgo.
Your Life path number is 1.

Your fortune cookie reads: Trust your intuition. The universe is guiding your life.

Your strengths:

You are a hard worker and a conscientious person. You are precise and take great care in what you do. You are highly-principled, disciplined, and responsible. You take your obligations very seriously. You are highly ethical.

You can be proud and upright, but, conversely, you are not particularly arrogant. You have compassion for people. You tend to persevere in the face of an obstacle or personality problem. You love your family and make a wonderful mate. Yet, you are not overly emotional, nor very demonstrative of your love. You tend to understate your affections.

You are constantly focused on the foundations of your life - whether it is in business, career, or family matters, you take care of the basics. You are highly rational. You are not one for pie-in-the-sky solutions to problems. Nor are you given to get-rich-quick schemes. Yours is the slow, patient approach, sound and secure. You also like to be in nature. You are a natural organizer and manager. People - especially relatives and co-workers - tend to rely on you. You are perceived as the rock of any endeavor.

33rd birthday !

Now Iam dedicating this Bryan Adams classic song - " 18 til I die" to myself.

Wanna be young - the rest of my life

Never say no - try anything twice
Til the angels come - and ask me to fly
Gonna be 18 til I die
Can’t live forever - that’s wishful thinkin’
Who ever said that - must of bin’ drinkin’
Don’t wanna grow up - I don’t see why
I couldn’t care less if time flies by
18 til I die - gonna be 18 til I die

Ya it sure feels good to be alive
Someday I’ll be 18 goin’ on 55! - 18 til I die
Anyway - I just wanna say
Why bother with what happened yesterday

It’s not my style - I live for the minute
If ya wanna stay young - get both feet in it - 18 til I die
A ‘lil bit of this - a ‘lil bit of that
‘Lil bit of everything - gotta get on track

It’s not how ya look, it’s what ya feel inside
I don’t care when - I don’t need ta know why
18 til I die - gonna be 18 til I die

Ya it sure feels good to be alive
Someday I’ll be 18 goin’ on 55! - 18 til I die
Ya there’s one thing for sure - I’m sure gonna try
Don’t worry ‘bout the future
Forget about the past

Gonna have a ball - ya we’re gonna have a blast
Gonna make it last

Sep 3, 2010

Shopping day ending BAdly

Im shopping for my nieces and nephews and since Eid is round the corner,I thought I will splurge a little in a box of good eye shadows and a treat for myself.I bought a few toys,some cute things for them to play with.FInally got to a shop and found perfect eye shadows and lipstick.Since I dont apply foundation at all,the eye shadows that I wear from the usual kit I have ,dont stand out at all.SO I thought go for those real dark creamy sort of eye shadows.
Im a kind of person who loves her lipstick and kajal.2 things I never leave my home without.But after a month of plain jane,I look forward to dressing up.Since we are still in the peak of summer season,cannot wear anything but cotton wear.But it a wonderful to see,everyone from a toddler to oldies dressed in their best.Its like peacocks gone erratic.
Anyways,I was with my friend.We went over to her place and I was waiting for my husband to pick me up.I leave my slippers outside for 5 minutes and then they are gone.The most comfortable and good looking slippers which I paid good money for,were just gone.Someone flicked them.
When you shoe shop,its not just buying what pleases your eyes.Its a tedious process.First of all,you convince your husband that with 5 pairs of shoes that you have,none of them are comfortable anymore.You have to stress at the entry zones and exit zones of your house that your feet have begun to hurt after walking for half an hour.Then you have to explain that they were great the day and weeks after you bought them.All your women friends were jealous that I had found the perfect wear and my feet looked great.Then after days of moaning and going aaw with your present shoes,your husband finally agrees to take you to that mall where you feel you will find a great pair.
Then the D-Day comes,you have to lsiten to non ending lectures from your hsuabnd as to why one should spend money on comfortable good shoes,rather than buy them in the name of fashion.He says some fashion just kills.He says fashion kills the feet,it kills the body,it kills the person who is looking at them (but personally I think it kills his wallet even more).
Then you walk into that store after looking through a dozen of them.You firstly,will find the pair that pleases your eye and your wallet.Then,you try the pair on and walk around,wondering,"Can I walk in the garden with this? Can I walk on the beach with this? Can I walk for an hour with this? How many of my girlfriends will like this? Are my feet looking good in this? " When the answer to al these questions is a "YES",you proceed to the counter and buy them.Now imagine,to buy that pair of slippers,it took me 2 n half weeks.Wouldnt I be pissed if someone just flicked them?
I now have only heeled footwear.All those glee hormones my body produced after all that shopping went down the drain, with my  best friend Depression knocking at my brain.
My husband is like,its ok.They were slippers.We'll get new ones.As if he can understand my sorrow.When he shops,he walks into the first store,holds the pair he likes,tests them,pays for it and he's out.It took him only 15 minutes to shop for his shoes.
Tomorrow we are going ticket shopping.Planning to buy emirates flight tickets.Lets see what the price range will be.We always travel by the same airlines.But with soaring prices and peak season,lets see what the air fare will be?The best part of travelling for me is the journey,pit stops,planes,being airport loafers,looking at other people travelling,etc.Its just great.Plus I love distance shopping at the dubai airport duty free stores.(distance shopping: window shopping from a great distance) Last time,I was teasing my husband wearing an afro at a store,begging him to click a picture.But them took a picture of me wearing clown googles.
Its time to open fast in a while.What am I planning to eat? Im by myself as usual and my hubby is at work.I have tuvar dal with spinach leaves,I have peas pulao with spinach leaves( too many spinach leaves lying waste in the fridge),I have holigey,my brother bought from India for himself( which I flicked and told him later),I have black tea,lassi,kiwi,santhrey,pomegranetes.Yeah ! Thats it.A little bit of everything and I have all the food categories in my tummy.Byeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Aug 29, 2010

Why are men like that !

What inspired me to write this piece was my husband,who came home yesterday night from completion of phase 2 of his project, with bad heat burns on his entire torso.He did some welding and was in one of his moods ,as it hurt a lot.Today ,he came back early from work,smiling from end to end,coz he got his leave and the medicated cream was finally doing good.

This got me thinking why is he like that? Then I thought - even my brother and dad did so too,so the question popped,why are men like that?

Why -
  • Fart especially around you and you catch them,you will find them smirking away.Is that funny? Is that smell suppose to send me jiggling with laughter? And when you question them,The cliche' response is ,"Hey ! Its a natural thing.Its suppose to happen.God intended it to be so."
  • Their idea of taking you out,could sometimes be,sitting in the car for hours ,while he and his friend are searching for something they feel is is very important and at the end of which,they will change their mind and say it was too expensive anyway.We don't need it that badly.
  • That water, on the kitchen or the bathroom floor is not a big deal.And to top it out,they will walk all over it and leave footprints.
       "  Oops,I didn't notice that ! It doesnt look that dirty?  "
         Like I need to know whats dirty and whats not !
  • Leave a trail of body hair all over the bathroom floor and sink after a shower and a trim.
         Why? What can I do about my hair,its there on my body,its bound         to fall somewhere when I'm naked.
  • They have to be reminded that  their hair has grown long enough and they now need a hair cut.They will sometimes wait (some of them at least) to go finish with the neanderthal phase.
Day 1: Sweetie,go have a haircut?         
           M: OK.

Day 3: Sweetie,you should go in today?  
          M : Yeah I know.

Day 5 : Sweetie,its too shaggy looking now,please go?
          M: Fine,I will see when I'm free.

Day 6: You have to get that haircut dear?
         M: Why are you bugging me everyday...have patience,I'm a busy man.

Day 8 : That's it! You cannot lie next to me with that head of yours.
          M: I'm on my way pumpkin.
  • Hates going to the mall.Why? Because its a place where people go to "line marofy". And why go to places for window shopping when you know you cant afford or want to buy those things?
What the hell is that suppose to mean? what is wrong with window shopping? Whats wrong with ogling and drooling over things you cant buy? At least you can see them first hand right !  Iam saving big bucks,cant you see.
  •  That friends or guests can be invited over for dinner or lunch but nothing in between.
I would love to throw tea parties,juice parties,ice cream parties,what is wrong with that theory? The English do it ,right !  Why does it always have to be a 4 course big meal.Why can we just chill?
M: Because its not polite and doesn't look good serving tea with nibbles.
Me : The freakin' Angrezis do...why cant we !
  • Why does the idea of throwing your clothes into hamper everyday seem wrong?
M : Why do I have to change everyday?
Me: Why are you waiting for fungus and algae to grow on your clothing by wearing it for 3 days in a row? Why cant you smell your perspiration at all? why cant you understand the fact that noticing all that butt scratching,crotch scratching makes me wonder if there are alien organisms in your clothes!
  • Why they don't understand the rituals of a woman's body care and think its bit too much.
Sweetie,lathering your skin with cream and deodorants makes one soft n supple.I do this coz I don't want to appear dry and brittle.I want a nice shiny skin.Other than making myself lush for you,I want to look good for ME.We love to pamper ourselves.If I can do that at home without spending 100s of bucks in the salon,then why not?
  • Why your ideas or suggestions are not that good when given at a  time,their own ideas haven't yet come into their minds yet.
A wife's idea or girlfriends ideas will only be good when the guy has had plenty of his ideas already.How dare we,made from their ribs,be the ones to think of something good and unique first.The manly men think of the best first and then come our ideas.
A couple of days ago,we were thinking about our vacation and when to take leave.I kept on yakking on and on explaining when is the best time to go and the in laws would be ecstatic if we could spend one festival with them.he kept nodding away.Today,he asks me to pull out the calendar and says the same thing again.And in the end,he goes like,"See ! I always think through all details before planning something." And I didn't want to crush him but In my mind I was like,who was I talking to that day...the evil twin?

But he is my sweetheart and I love him to pieces.I'm sure he has so much to pick on in me.

Aug 27, 2010

Diary page of a woman trying to sleep.

Nowadays,my sleep pattern has taken for the worse.I dont sleep when I should and therefore sleep late.But then I dont oversleep but get up early as well.This continues for a couple of days and then one day I hit the pillow and sleep for long periods of time.

First of all,I need to get this thing out of my head.I dreamt a couple of days ago,that I was a handsome man who just started dating this gorgeous woman.So on the day we meet at my primary school premises, where the electricity is absent,she tells me she has a 2 year old toddler.I light a candle and am very happy that I found a readymade family.As I go near the baby and touch his tiny hands,the baby scratches the flesh of it.I scream,the woman aint there at the moment,the kid turns Chucky on me,its hair gets all pointy,its eyes turn all black,the nails turn black and long and the child stands up with the scariest smile and says,"SO you think you can date my mom.Run ,run ,as fast as you can.Hide in those halls but I will find you and chop you into bits."I was so darn frightened,I literally scream into the ears of my sub conscious to wake me up and I did.

So there it is.I hope it doesnt haunt my mind anymore.Now its out there.

Lets move on to the real part of my blog.

I put my husband to bed by midnight.He had to get his beauty sleep as he was planning on leaving very early for work the next day.SO there on my bed I started thinking.At 1 am the comedy videos will begin and at 2 am,HOUSE episode will satrt and finish by 3 am.That was easy.House finished and then suddenly I wanted to drink instant coffee.I woke up and made nescafe and had it.Eventually Im going to fall asleep.Let me check the time.What the hell! Its only 3:20 am.No problem,let me go online and see if anyone has uploaded some pics.NAh !....No interesting comments to comment back on.I shouldnt have finished my Mahjong game so soon.Should have played 1 level per day.But I did play well.SO what If I played 2 of the levels over 50 times to complete it.I dont want use the PC.So I shut it off.

Whats the time! what,its only 3:50 am.Let me watch that arabic serial today.DID Zohra leave her 3rd husband again? Did her first husband sew her for cheating him? What exactly does that dialogue mean? ( egyptian arabic is way different than kuwaiti arabic,cant understand it completely.)Darn,I watched that episode already.MAybe if I get bored,I fall asleep.Nah ! still too boring but not making me sleepy.

What time is it ! Its 4:30 am.Good.Maybe I will fall asleep soon.I must switch the TV off.Maybe then I will have no choice but fall asleep.I switched it off.Now Im talking to myself inside my head.

Suzaan,you should fall asleep,come on,you can do it.You have a lot to do tomorrow.COme on,sleep.Maybe if I count sheep jumping across the fence like they show in the cartoons,I may feel sleepy.1 , 2 , 3 , 4 , 5 ,..Hey what time is it now ! Let me check...Surely Its 5 am now.What????? Its 4:50 am.

Closing my eyes,I go into my monologues again.

Maybe Aunty and her family reached Pakistan already.Maybe they wont find the time to rest before the funeral of their grandma.Gosh ! My grandma was so sweet.My dad cried so much when she died.How am I going to cope if something happened to my folks.No,I may not cry for we werent so close.No,I may cry a lot because I missed them so much.SUzaan ! Stop thinking such things.SLeep......Hey ! Im supposed to get my periods soon.When is the date? Let me count quickly and then I will definitely sleep.1 , 2 , 3 , ...crap Its tomorrow.Shish...Let me think real deep...Am I PMSing? Did I start overeating already ? (coz they are one of my positive signs of approaching periods.)  No Im not cranky as such....I didnt yell at my husabnd at all.How would that happen,he wasnt around the whole day ! What time is it ? Let me have a quick peek.5:30 am.

Shut your eyes woman.Okay let me make myself calm....God please give me good sleep. And also good  dreams.Hmmmm....ARe my nails clean? I opened my eyes and checked a few.Before I smack you mad,Put that arm down and go to sleep.ARe you crazy? checking your nails instead of sleeping.Hehehehhe...I should blog about this.....People will think Im crazy.Will you just sleep already.My brain works so much.Im thinking and it has no time to even fall asleep.Oooo...Whats brain dead then? If a person is brain dead,then he is declared legally dead and referred to as a vegetable.Whats a coma then? The heart cannot survive without a functioning brain.Its the heart stops,one is dead,if the brain stops,you're still sort of dead.Good,my brain is hyperactive.What time is it? 6 am.

Got to remove those chunks of ice I put to set in and empty them into my husband thermal ice box.He will wake up in 45 mins and make a lot of noise by filling water and what not ! If I fall into deep sleep  and its ruined again,Im going to be very cranky.Then I got up,filled water into the 2 boxes,filled it with water bottles and soft drinks.He had to take it to work.Then I filled the containers again.I have to make ice for tomorrow but what if My husband just pulls them out of the freezer thinking it is ice and spill water all over the carpet..NAh..I get up after Im done sleeping and then fill them up.

I had to do the whole filling and emptying quitely lest I wake my darling.What time is it? 6:28 am.

I should have rubbed some coconut oil onto my eyelids,maybe I would feel sleepy.Whats that? My back is hurting slightly.My ear feels ticklish.OMG,dont tell Im having an ear infection.Let me move my jaws and see if it hurting.Have I been having ticklish ears for days or was it just now!Darn it ! Im going to take an antibiotic in the evening.But now I must fall asleep.

What am I gonna dream? Wh....a...t  ti.....m....e  i....s  i????????????

Dictionary of a MOM:

BABY: 1) Dad, when he gets a cold. 2) Mom’s youngest child, even if he’s 42.

CARPET: Expensive floor covering used to catch spills and clean mud off shoes.

COOK: 1) Act of preparing food for consumption. 2) Mom’s other name.

DATE: Infrequent outings with Dad where Mom can enjoy worrying about the kids in a different setting.

ENERGY: Element of vitality kids always have an oversupply of until asked to do something.

FABLE: A story told by a teenager arriving home after curfew.

FROZEN: 1) A type of food. 2) How hell will be like when Mom lets her daughter date an older guy with a motorcycle.

GENIUSES: Amazingly, all of Mom’s kids.

GUM: Adhesive for the hair.

HANDI-WIPES: Pants, shirtsleeves, drapes, etc.

HANDS: Body appendages which must be scrubbed raw with volcanic soap and sterilized in boiling water immediately prior to consumption of the evening meal.

HINDSIGHT: What Mom experiences from changing too many diapers.

HOMEMADE BREAD: An object of fiction like the Fountain of Youth and the Golden Fleece.

ICE: Cubes of frozen water which would be found in small plastic tray if kids or husbands ever filled the darn things instead of putting them back in the freezer empty.

INSIDE: That place that will suddenly look attractive to kids once Mom has spent a minimum of half an hour getting them ready to go outside.

“I SAID SO”: Reason enough, according to Mom.

JACKPOT: When all the kids stay at friends’ homes for the night.

JEANS: Which, according to kids, are appropriate for just about any occasion, including church and funerals.

JOY RIDE: Going somewhere without the kids.

JUNK: Dad’s stuff.

KETCHUP: The sea of tomato-based goop kids use to drown the dish that Mom spent hours cooking and years perfecting to get the seasoning just right.

KISS: Mom medicine.

LAKE: Large body of water into which a kid will jump should his friends do so.

LEMONADE STAND: Complicated business venture where Mom buys powdered mix, sugar, lemons, and paper cups, and sets up a table, chairs, pitchers and ice for kids who sit there for three to six minutes and net a profit of 15 cents.

MAKEUP: Lipstick, eyeliner, blush, etc., which ironically make Mom look better while making her young daughter look “cheap.”


MILK: A healthful beverage which kids will gladly drink once it’s turned into junk food by the addition of sugar and cocoa.

OCEAN: What the bathroom floor looks like after bath night for kids, assorted pets, two or three full-sized towels and several dozen toy boats, cars and animals.

OPEN: The position of children’s mouths when they eat in front of company.

OVERSTUFFED RECLINER: Mom’s nickname for Dad.

PENITENTIARY: Where children who don’t eat their vegetables or clean their rooms eventually end up, according to Mom.

PETS: Small, furry creatures which follow kids home so Mom will have someone else to clean up after.

PURSE: A handbag in which Mom carries the checkbook and keys she can never find because they’re buried under tissues, gum wrappers, a plastic container full of cereal, toys from a fast-food restaurant, a teddy bear, a football, wallpaper samples, a grocery list and several outdated coupons.

QUIET: A state of household serenity which occurs before the birth of the first child and occurs again after the last child has left for college.

SOAP: A cleaning agent Mom puts on the sink on the off-chance one of her kids will accidentally grab it while reaching for the towel.

SPIT: All-purpose cleaning fluid especially good on kids’ faces.

SPOILED ROTTEN: What the kids become after as little as 15 minutes with Grandma.

TROUBLE: Area of nonspecific space a child can always be sure to be in.

UMPTEENTH: Highly conservative estimate of the number of times Mom must instruct her offspring to do something before it actually gets done.

UNDERWEAR: An article of clothing, the cleanliness of which ensures the wearer will never have an accident.

WALLS: Complete set of drawing paper for kids that comes with every room.

WASHING MACHINE: Household appliance used to clean blue jeans, permanent ink markers, loose change, homework, tissues and wads of gum.

“WHEN YOUR FATHER GETS HOME”: Standard measurement of time between crime and punishment.

“YIPPEE!”: What Mom would jump up and shout if the school year was changed to 12 months.

Aug 24, 2010

Festivals that scared us.

I was on facebook and one of my friend had posted a Happy Raksha Bandhan on it.I actually started laughing because it reminded me of the good old days of college.Come Rakhi day and the boys would sweat at the sight of a good looking girl,wondering if she will wish me happy rakhi or worse tie one,and that would be the end of his fantasy.I never had that problem coz I was sort of a guy.:>.Anyways,we did have some chicks in our class and it was fun to see the manly men avoiding girls during breaks and what not.

Then when I came to college,it was a totally different sight.Our college gates were the only visible thing from the outside.The main temples of study were located way inside.Firstly,you had the schools,then high school ,then Library and then the college classrooms.Since we were all women's college,we were surrounded by the opposite sex at all times outside our college.

When you are between the ages of 17 - 21,you start prancing around like a peacock.The peacock should have been a female.Either its gay or something went wrong in its evolution.You,as in college girl, will dress up well at all times except when there are exams.You are actually  motivated to wear something different or look better or cooler everyday.You will wear makeup,you will look fresh ,no matter how scorching the weather maybe.The latest in salwar kameez coz our college had a strict policy for anything above knee length or pants of any sorts.

There was this tiny joint outside our college famous for egg puffs and veg puffs and maybe chicken too.Half of the ladies from our college ate there.They would stand in the heat if they had to,but there was something about those puffs and cold drinks.It was just around the end of the road and the guys would come in their flashy bikes or few of them I guess borrowed cars for this joyous safari ride.You could see guys packed in cars.2 guys on a bike.Wearing Sunglasses,jeans,Tee's,etc.I guess like the girls,they too splashed a little dough on their t-shirts and jeans and not forgetting the cash for the diesel or petrol or whatever went into their rides.In that one hour of break ,you would see the same car and vehicles and the people in them circling so many times,you knew their number plates even.At that age,a smile from an older man or guy of weird sorts,all ,would bring glee in one's hearts and an automatic returnfire smile.

Come raksha Bandhan day,the traffic would be light.You wouldnt have road jams.A few guys who did still circle around,would make sure they were deaf for that day.It was peaceful actually.You could cross the road without wondering which guy's car you will come under coz his eyes arent on the road.I was amazed at how seriously this day was revered by the boys actually.I had a Rakhi brother too.He was a nice guy.We havent been in touch for years but he is a great guy.

Then we had Rose day.OMG,this day was actually a competetion.Every girl was your enemy.The girl who walked in with roses in her hand before she entered the college campus meant,she was considered hot by her many fans out there.No rose was too expensive,even if in the end,the guy threw that rose on a girl who didnt even see you ride away.I was actually intrigued and would actually observe with my girlfriend, who got how many.In the lunch break,the roads would be packed.There used to be hawaldars if im not mistaken to smoothen the traffic out.Back then I knew of 2-3 girls who almost every guy outside our campus had the hots for.They had good figures and wore clothes that showed their curves.They were slim,streaked their hair and had time to wear makeup.Oh,they would walk out,and the horns honked away,slight whistling here and there,lots of ogling and lots of pollution.Carbon monoxide expulsion was at its best this day.

Those were indeed good old fun days.Now, it takes an axe to the head or bucket of tears for that ogling,smiling to happen from the husband.I did have a neighbour who flashed me a charming smile every now and then ,but I never encouraged him at no point.Being the Bharatiya Nari that Iam,I couldnt give dhokha to my pati.(exceptions are dreams)

My husband does tease me or give me a naughty smile when we are in public,and i love that.But if I even mention that some guy,looked at me wrong for 2 secs,he transforms into ,no ! not a transformer,but into Yamraj.The dialogue will go like this,
" Kidher hai wo? Kaun hai wo? Tumne pehle kyu nahi bola? Kya kiya usne? {MEanwhile he is staring around like as if he has rabies,which actually scares the crap out of me}Kaun hai wo kamina,maa-der-chut,sharam nai athi...auratho ki koi izzat hi nai karta."

I know how angry he can get,he beat up 5 guys once and it  was a mess of cops and fines.And we were sort of dating at the time.Now I just cant let him do that.So I take care of myself.I give my Kaali Maa stare and yell in arabic and no one dare approach me.

Iam famished and have cooking to do and 2 hours to go before I break my fast.

Aug 23, 2010


DO you have friends who are always under the impression,that no matter what you tell them,you are telling them out of jealousy.Hatred is understood so is anger.But why do people have envy at the back of their mind.Some people like to have constant good evaluations done about them and some just think they are the creme de la creme of just about everybody and everything.

Now the creme de la creme group of people.These are people you will find amongst family members and distant friends.We wouldnt make them are friends, right ? No one likes to be looked down upon or sneered at !We wouldnt like to be constantly belittled in their presence.

These are people who are doing well and live "the life".They have their own exclusive club.Appearances mean everything be it the clothes on their body or the things in their house or in what they utter at all public moments.They belive that everyone who isnt in their radar,is inferior or worth having around.What they are going to do,or where they are going to go or what they are wearing ,and so on and so forth,are things everyone will know well beforehand.They are made known as honourable mentions at parties or get togethers.The purpose being to infuse envy,which gives them a feeling of  profound regard.But I think,this means something else is lacking in your life which makes you want some sort of assessment.Which is in the form of people 's reaction.I think other's envy sort of pep's them up.

Now,another group of people you will come across who need praise at all times to get going.

I love praises and accept them from very few.It could be my superiors at work.It could be my husband.It could be from someone I love dearly.But not from anyone else.Im not good at accepting compliments because I feel the other person is saying just for the heck of it or is saying it sarcastically.Im not generous at giving them either coz I think they should be given only when deserved.

No,the people Im talking about are the ones who coerce you into giving a compliment or say something nice.They put you on the spot in front of others.MAybe its like "I shapat,mene tho sunkar hi rehna hai." It could someone who did some shopping and are showing it to you for your opinion.It could be someone who invited you for dinner or any meal and you are expected to comment on their cooking skills or the time and effort gone into pulling it off inspite of their oh so"Im so busy to even find a breath " schedule.What are the rest of us doing? HAving our maids follow us around and clean after us.

I was once invited for dinner to a friend's place for the first time.Im a fan of real spicy food.SHe made bland food but it was good.If you have cooked well,your guests or family will be cleaning the pots out with their tongue.If it isnt,you are bound to find leftovers of large proportions.This should speak for itself.But she kept on asking us over and over again."Wasnt the food good? Didnt it taste great? You know i put this many hours of work into it? "

What is one to reply to this ! I told her it was good but she kept expecting exotic words of praise from me and put me in the spot.

Then i have another friend,who will always ask me " how do i look?" after she has dressed up.Or when she comes visiting.You got ready in front of a mirror right,why ask others.If you look great,you will be told so .

I love when my husband says something nice but he never says so.When I cook something upto his liking,he will plainly say,"Lagta hai dil laga ke banaya hai." Which means the food is awesome babe.When he doesnt comment on how I look,that means its ok.If he comments,its usually to say the outfit isnt tailored right.He told me he likes the color blue on me after 5 long years.He thinks that specifying what he likes would mean he is imposing on me.

Well,my frankness is misconstrued as rudeness.My aloofness as too much pride.My moodiness,well as moodiness.

Aug 18, 2010

Message sent by your Body!

Our actions (body language) reflects our interest in various ways. In general, these actions manifest by instinct when we are facing people that we admire. For example, in intimate conversation, people usually look at each other's eyes. Sometimes we shift our vision from one eye to the other, and to the bridge of the nose. Some say that it’s rude to look at a stranger’s body, but when you really think about it, people really can’t help it when they feel attracted. When people are talking to mere acquaintances, they simply look at their eyes, but when people are interested in someone, they tend to notice a lot more than just the eyes and the nose. Also... looking at the someone's mouth can suggest interest in kissing.

When two people enjoy similar things, they tend to move in sync with each other. This does not mean that every single move they make is exactly the same, but rather that their moods are the same.

When people are interested in the person they’re talking to, they tend to face the person more. This is also noticeable in a person’s arms and legs. When a person’s attention is completely focused on another, their legs, knees, or feet are always extended in the direction of the other person. Another common signal are the pupils of our eyes. When people like what they see, their pupils increase in size, and tend to blink more. Eyes can blink in sync when looking into the eyes of the person they like.

Male Body Language and Flirting

Aside from general body language, there are also signs specific to males and to females when they show their interest in a potential mate. When a man notices a woman he finds attractive, he may suck in his gut, flex his muscles, and other postures that cause him to appear taller and stronger.

A man shows his readiness to get involved by putting his hands on his hips, or putting his thumbs behind his belt. Most men do this to appear macho and posed, but a commonly unknown fact is that this action also highlights the genital region sending the message:

“I’m virile.”

Men do other things like smoothing their hair, and fixing ties, to make them look their best. Men do these while women are watching to show their interest.

The actions of women, on the other hand, are more subtle but very sexy in the eyes of men. A woman can make a man desire her more by exposing the skin of her neck.

Female Body Language and Flirting

When a woman tosses her hair from one side to the other, the gesture appears more intentional, and is often followed by a well directed intimate gaze.

The same thing goes when a woman exposes the thin skin on her wrist. Both actions appeal to men saying, “I want to show you more.” Women can very well play with men’s minds by doing little things like wiping off their sweat, and fondling with their hair, fingers, and feet.

The most appealing sign a woman can give is to sit with one leg pressed on top of the other. This gesture makes the legs appear very well toned. A hand on the thigh completes the position and is definitely considered a call for the attention.


Now Im going to say how i used to flirt.I actually didnt know I was but when I read some books and articles ,like millions I too didnt know I flirted.

For the life of me,I cannot fake interest in anyone's yakking if I dont like what they're talking about.That has been my weakpoint and people can see through me when Im faking interest.I cannot laugh at jokes if I dont find them funny.I have seen many people easily mask a smile or laugh as if they heard the joke of century but Since I cant fake it ,I can spot a faker very easily.

Now When I liked a cute guy,I tend to smile more often or shy away a tiny smile looking the other side.Iam a hands person,meaning I will use my hands to gesture in the air while talking and I touch people's arm.I do this unknowingly and am not aware of my actions or impact.

I'll use my eyes a lot and blink and flutter them a lot when Im talking to someone interesting.Now I never adjusted my boobs or my legs or cleavage or anything like that to get attention.Giving off even a hiff a desperation isnt my style coz I always think,if Im really appealing,someone will attend to me without me doing the peacock dance.

Now I know girls wear skimpy outfits or reveal little skin as an invitation and thanks to the fashion industry,all dresses in the market are made just for that.To allure the opposite sex.

Iam an old fashioned kinda gal : Nazrein mili,dil dhadka aur pyar ho gaya.I never dated anyone for money or looks.Im a bit shallow though.I hate curly hair in men.The curlier they are,the more I avoid them.That would include intensive all around acne and someone who cannot communicate in english.I did like someone who couldnt speak english but I was 14.At that age,even a chaprasi is all mighty and handsome and worth being the father of your many children.So you see,Im not an angel as well.

I did ask my husband a couple of times as to what attracted him to me and 5 yrs into our marriage,he gave me a very brief answer.That I was straight forward,dont lie ,have a firm head over my shoulders and am an empathizer.When I smiled from one corner to another,he said thats enough.The part of not knowing every little detail holds its own charm or else you're gonna be flying with wings and horns.

Aug 16, 2010

The Potty Predicament and The Perfect Parent

I bought a potty for my son before he turned a year old. It was one of the colorful, deluxe models with removable parts, a front- loading plastic bowl, and sure-grip sides. I’d been having glorious visions almost since I left the delivery room, of my brilliant progeny fully trained and diaper- free by 18 months... heck, make that 15 months.

We’d be the envy of all my friends, whose deficient toddlers remained untrained at age two. I kept the commode in the closet for a few weeks, not wanting to place unrealistic expectations on my son. When I finally placed it, with much fanfare, in the bathroom, the child seemed delighted-- he examined it closely, giggled and squealed while I beamed as I planned how to spend the money I’d save on diapers.

Over the next few months, however, the potty was transformed into a nagging symbol of intergenerational warfare. The first skirmish -- over positioning -- raged throughout the house and left me exhausted and demoralized. I would place the potty in the bathroom, only to return a few hours, minutes, or even seconds later to find it missing.

Soon thereafter, the potty’s various parts would begin turning up in the closets, under my bed, in my husband’s underwear drawer, in the backyard sandbox – even once floating in the birdbath. The bowl -- the very heart of the contraption -- was chewed on, colored on, used to collect toys, books, hairpins even feminine hygiene products carelessly left within reach. Something about the seat aroused my son’s creative energies.

Inexplicably, it elicited intricate crayon drawings and doubled as a playpen for his stuffed animals. As his strength, coordination, and evil intent grew, this fruit of my womb figured out how to fill the bowl from the bathtub, which he then carried around and slowly drained in a trail of carpet- soaking spots. Eventually, despite my inadequate strategy, I won the battle by attrition. My son became bored.

The potty, now looking like a fourth-generation hand-me-down, remained in the bathroom. I took this as a hopeful sign and launched a campaign to wear down his resistance. Every hour on the hour, I dragged him, kicking and screaming, into the bathroom. First, I tried literary inducements to get him to sit on the potty. I’d read his favorite stories over and over, speaking in an animated tone designed to capture his attention. Next, I ventured into singing -- his favorite was John, Jacob, Jingleheimer, Schmidt. My voice would careen around the words, faster and faster, as if I could create some kind of gravitational force that would pull down his little posterior.

No luck. One of my well-meaning, if misguided, friends insisted that boys need a target to aim at, so I filled the potty with water and then dumped in half a bag of Cheerios, hoping to challenge his competitive instincts. I caught him scooping the soggy circles out with his hand and cramming them into his mouth. That’s when I invoked the dreadful specter of peer pressure. Do you want to be the only two-year-old you know who’s still in diapers, I asked, almost weeping at the prospect. But it didn’t work, my boy was impervious to public opinion.

His second birthday came and went, and I began to lose sleep, picturing my son at his high school graduation in Huggies, size extra extra large. Reluctantly, but feeling desperate, I played my trump card -- bribery -- promising him candy for each successful use of the potty. His eyes gleamed with sweet anticipation, but still, the kid wouldn’t give in.

Finally, frustrated beyond words, I resorted to coercion, holding him, squirming furiously, on the potty. I only did it once. He deliberately pointed his penis up and baptized me with all of a child’s righteous indignation at my unjust use of force. He began to have terrible stomachaches because he would not allow himself to have a bowel movement. I cried along with him, begging him to let his "poo" come out. I explained in a sanguine, Mr.Rogers voice that his poo was sad because it had to come out all alone in his diaper, but if he’d let it out in the potty, he could flush it down to play happily with all the other "poos." He eyed me with a forbearance, but -quite literally -- continued to hold his own.

Worried that he was poisoning his insides, I started putting a Pull-up on him every evening at the same time. As soon as it was on, he’d slip quietly into his room and close the door. Once or twice, I peeked through the door to see what he was doing. He’d place his hands on the foot of the bed, feet a straddle as if he were water skiing. Next I’d hear a series of grunts. In a few minutes, he’d emerge, shame-faced. "Mommy" he’d say, with a telltale aroma trailing him, "I pooed." I’d let out a heavy, pained sigh and shake my head as if he’d just confessed to crimes against humanity.

As the three-year mark approached, and I saw my son upstaged by other, younger children who pranced proudly to the potty, I became truly depressed about this maternal failure. Despondently, I deployed my final weapon. I put away the potty and bought a large supply of Pull-ups. When my son informed me that he needed to be changed, I acted deliriously happy, never once even mentioning the toilet and its uses.

After all those agonizing months, this strategy succeeded in exactly two days. The demon seed I’d previously considered my son, started using the toilet as if he’d been doing it all his life. Now, more than a year later, I can’t get him out of the bathroom. He has in-depth conversations with himself or an imaginary friend. (I haven’t quite figured out which) while he’s defecating, ranging from a soliloquy on the makeup of the solar system to what sounds like a verbal tour of his more interesting body parts. Walking by the bathroom one day, I heard him say, "Would you like to see what a penis looks like?" Dazed, I continued down the hall, wondering what I’d created.

I used to be a perfect parent. I had strong opinions about the best ways to raise a healthy happy, well-mannered child. I vowed that my children would appear well-groomed and clean at all times, they would be disicipline by firm, fair, and consistant parenting techniques, and they would always, always be well-behaved in a restaurant. And when they were older, I would instill a sense of self-confidence and mutual respect by showing them that I valued their opinions and by treating them as equals. My ideas were so straightforward and simple that I couldn't understand why other parents couldn't be as perfect as I was. Then I had two children.

I used to think that any mother, whose child was inappropriately dressed and had Kool Aid stains around his lips before eleven o'clock in the morning, was obviously an unfit parent who spends her days talking on the phone -- and who serves fruit loops and popsicles for breakfast.

My opinion changed when my two-year old daughter decided that she no longer wanted to wear clothing in public. One minute she'd be in her stroller, fully dressed, innocently sucking on a pacifier in her stroller. And the next, she'd be waving at strangers wearing only a diaper and her pair of red patent leather shoes. The first few times this happened I kept putting her clothes back on - only to have them thrown at me again two seconds later. After several days of struggling to keep her fully dressed, I finally decided that it would be less stressful and much faster if she just started out naked when we left the house.

I also used to think that parents who let their children watch cartoons, instead of doing enriching activities together like reading, lacked self discipline and motivation. This was before my son turned three and I began daydreaming about how great it would be if he stopped making big messes around the house and did nothing but watch television. There would be no toys to pick up, no play doh to peel out of the carpet and no crayons to take out of nostrils. Besides I figured if he got really hooked on a few afternoon cartoons I could finally get some chores done around the house.

Before I had children I was going to be a good, health-conscious parent. My family would only eat organic produce and dairy products, fresh fruit, yeast free bread, and un-medicated, free range turkey. Sugar would never, ever touch their lips.

I changed my mind the first time I took my toddler to the grocery store by myself and she refused to bend her legs so she could fit into the front seat of the shopping cart. "If you get in the cart Mommy will give you part of the nice candy bar she has in her purse." I whispered desperately in her ear.

This tactic worked well until she had eaten all of the candy. Then she decided the trip would be much more interesting if she got out of the cart and flung all of the food off of the shelves as ran down the aisles. So I did what any other modern, educated mother would do: I desperately started tossing junk food into the cart. I mentally calculated that one box of mini donuts should be enough to get me through the dairy section and halfway through produce. The caramel corn should last through frozen food and the entire paper product section, and the Tootsie Pop sucker should give me enough time to get through the register, out the door and back to the car.

As the cashier began ringing up my cartful of empty junk food boxes it became clear that the one thing preventing me from being a perfect parent -- were my children.

Now when my children go into public I want to stop people and let them know that I am really a good parent. I want to tell them that my son is eating a popsicle for breakfast because he is going through a phase where he will only eat blue food and I'm running out of options. He has a dirty dishtowel tucked into the back of his shirt because he thinks it's a cape and today he wants to be Batman. And my daughter is wearing her bathing suit with a pair of cowboys boots because she picked out her own outfit and she thinks the leather tassels go great with the pink netting on her skirt.

And when I yell things like " because I'm the Mommy and I said so that's why!" I really mean "I can understand your desire, but it is my duty as a concerned mother to constantly look out for your best interest".

Sometimes I wonder how it would feel to appear in public with two orderly, quiet children with immaculate faces and clean clothes. I could shop without anyone repeating "can I have a big pretzel now, Mommy" every three seconds like some sort of hypnotic mantra. Maybe I could even stop to look at something. Or enter a store, get only what I actually need, then leave!

But I have a feeling my life wouldn't be nearly as exciting. Besides, my children have taught me that being a good parent has a lot more to do with patience, commitment, and understanding -- than looking perfect.

And now, when I see a mother with a child who is happily meandering behind her eating a Twinkie, and wearing wrinkled dinosaur pajamas and a pair of swim fins, I no longer think she's an unfit parent -- I know that she is just doing the best that she can.

Facts of Life

By Sallie Mattison Young

So there we were, my husband and I, stealing a few quick smooches behind the open refrigerator door, when Ariel, 10, catches us.

"Eeeuuwww, gross," she said, giggling. "You guys were kissing!" Emily, 7, came up behind her, eyes wide with interest.

Not wanting them to go into that "kissing is mushy" routine, I've always believed the best defense is a good offense; so I said, "Well, just exactly how do you think you two got here, anyway?"

Emily rolled her eyes, then explained very patiently, "We GOT here when we moved from our old house to this new house!"

You Know You're a Mom When...

...Your feet stick to the kitchen floor and you don't care.

...the kids are fighting, you threaten to lock them in a room together and not let them out until someone's bleeding.

...You can't find your cordless phone, so you ask a friend to call you, and you run around the house madly, following the sound until you locate the phone downstairs in the laundry basket.

...You spend an entire week wearing sweats.

...Your idea of a good day is making it through without a child leaking bodily fluids on you.

...Popsicles become a food staple.

...Your favorite television show is a cartoon.

...Peanut butter and jelly is eaten at least in one meal a day.

...You're willing to kiss your child's boo-boo, regardless of what body part it happens to be on.

...Your baby's pacifier falls on the floor and you give it back to her after you suck the dirt off of it because you're too busy to wash it off.

...You value sleep above all else.

...Your kids make jokes about farting, burping, pooping, etc., and you think it's funny.

...You're so desperate for adult conversation that you spill your guts to the telemarketer that calls and HE hangs up on YOU!

...Spit is your number one cleaning agent.

...You're up each night until 10 PM vacuuming, dusting, wiping, washing, drying, loading, unloading, shopping, cooking, driving, flushing, ironing, sweeping picking up, changing sheets, changing diapers, bathing, helping with homework, paying bills, budgeting, clipping coupons, folding clothes, putting to bed, dragging out of bed, brushing, chasing, buckling, feeding (them, not you), PLUS swinging, playing baseball, bike riding, pushing trucks, cuddling dolls, rollerblading, basketball, football, catch, bubbles, sprinklers, slides, nature walks, coloring, crafts, jumping rope, PLUS raking, trimming, planting, edging, mowing, gardening, painting, and walking the dog.

...You get up at 5:30 AM and you have no time to eat, sleep, drink or go to the bathroom, yet you still managed to gain 10 pounds.

...In your bathroom there is toothpaste on the light fixtures, water all over the floor, a dog drinking out of the toilet and body hair forming a union to protest unsafe working conditions.

...You buy cereal with marshmallows in it.

...The closest you get to gourmet cooking is making Rice Krispie bars

...You eat your dinner on dinosaur-decorated placemats

...You catch yourself singing the "Barney" theme song -- in public.

...You take phone messages in crayon

...You buy jelly according to the characters on the jar.

...You know the best way to scrape dried Cheerios off the floor.

...You don't own a single store-bought Christmas tree ornament

...You share the storage closet with a miniature broom and vacuum cleaner.

...You always buying the big pack of batteries-- but you can never find one when you need one.

Some Funny things !

I found this article online and found it to be almost truthful and funny at the same time.See if you share the same feeling and please dont be offended in any way.

Why Breed?

Reasons given : I can’t help it, it’s a biological urge.

Real reasons  : Unexamined motivations.

Suggested alternatives  : Institutions await those who can’t control

                                    their biological urges.

Reasons given : Want to give our parents grandchildren.

Real reasons : Still seeking parental approval.

Suggested alternatives : Live your own life and encourage your parents to do the same.

Reasons given : I just love children.

Real reasons : Out of touch with inner child, and with existing children.

Suggested alternatives : Adopt, step, and foster parenting.

Big Brother/Sister. Work with children, teach.

Reasons given : I have superior human genes.

Real reasons : Doesn’t recognize an oxymoron.


Suggested alternatives : Do great things with your genes, rather than expecting the next cultured batch to do it.

Reasons given : Need help on farm or in family business.

Real reasons : Too cheap to hire help.

Child labor laws inconvenient.

Suggested alternatives : Mechanization gives faster return on investment.

Reasons given : Want someone to care for me in my old age.

Real reasons : Fear of aging.

Exploitative personality.

Suggested alternatives : Save money and prepare for retirement. Be nice to people so they will visit you in the home.

Reasons given : Pregnancy and childbirth are life experiences.

Real reasons :  Life choices limited by social indoctrination.

Suggested alternatives : Rent pregnancy simulator. Choose different life experiences.

Reasons given : A good family is essential to career advancement and strong standing in the community.

Real reasons : Social insecurity. Wants trophy children to improve social status.

Suggested alternatives : Rent children from talent agency on special occasions. Have white picket fence installed.

Reasons given : We want to create a life which embodies our love for each other.

Real reasons : Ego, times two, minus imagination, equals three plus.

Suggested alternatives : Garden. Adopt a stream, trail, or hiway. Rescue animals. Protect & restore ecosystems to embody love.

Reasons given : I want my kids (who don’t exist yet) to have all the things I didn’t have.

Real reasons : Unfulfilled childhood desires and fantasies.

Suggested alternatives : Deal with regrets & make best of life. Provide for existing children.

Reasons given : To carry on family name.

Real reasons : Trying to please Dad.

Duped by bloodline superstition.

Suggested alternatives : Create something enduring & give it family name. Donate blood to pass on bloodline.

Reasons given : Want to see a little me.

Real reasons : Self-absorption. Lack of ego gratification.

Suggested alternatives : Order custom-made, life-like doll.

Create a gratifying life of your own.

Reasons given : God wants us to.

Real reasons : Mindless obedience to dogma peddlers who want larger flocks.

Suggested alternatives : Seek true nature of God, whatever you perceive God to be.

Reasons given : My wife/husband wants a baby.

Real reasons : Giving in out of fear of losing partner.

Suggested alternatives : Communicate true desires. Spouse may feel you’re the one who wants to breed. Rent baby simulator doll.

Reasons given : Want a child with our bloodline.

Real reasons : Ego extension. Racial identity.

Suggested alternatives : Recognize value of people with different genetic makeups.

Reasons given : It’s a spiritual thing for me.

Real reasons : Other reasons too easily refuted.

Suggested alternatives : Find truly spiritual experiences.

Reasons given : I’ve always wanted to have children, it’s what people do.

Real reasons : Unquestioned cultural conditioning.

Suggested alternatives : Consider alternatives. Question expectations. Adopt.

Reasons given : To cement our relationship.

Real reasons : Fear of failed marriage.

Suggested alternatives : Communicate to strengthen relationship. Attend retreats for bonding couples.

Reasons given : I love babies.

Real reasons : Short-sighted view of reality.

Suggested alternatives : Babies soon turn into children, then adults. Infant care work is available. Life-like infant doll may help.

Reasons given : Being a mother is a woman’s highest calling.

Real reasons : Beguiled into believing compliance is noble free choice.

Suggested alternatives : Motherhood, and fatherhood, may be achieved without breeding. Many children wait for good homes.

Reasons given : My child could find a way to save the world.

Real reasons : “Mother of God” complex. (Also applies to men).

Suggested alternatives : If you want something done right, do it yourself.

Reasons given : We’d like to try for a boy/girl this time.

Real reasons : Ego extension. Gender identity insecurity. Dissatisfaction with existing offspring.

Suggested alternatives : Appreciate who you have, they might resent their sibling whose gender is preferred.

Reasons given : I just want to.

Real reasons : Just wants to.

Suggested alternatives : Choosing to breed precludes most other things you’ll just want to do.

Reasons given : I want someone who will love me and not leave me.

Real reasons : Fear of rejection. Unresolved relationship issues.

Suggested alternatives : Give love to get love. Accept change and deal with loss.

Reasons given : Our economy needs young workers to replace retired workers.

Real reasons : Willing to sacrifice offspring to gods of National Economy.

Suggested alternatives : Automation reduces need for wage slaves. Consider rights of unconceived to stay that way.

Reasons given : The world needs more of us or we’ll be outnumbered.

Real reasons : Elitism. Xenophobia. Eugenics easier to conceal than genocide.

Suggested alternatives : Convert others to your views so there’ll be one more of your kind and one less of Them.

Reasons given : We may as well, the planet is doomed anyway.

Real reasons : Nihilistic natalism.

Suggested alternatives : Consider ethics of sentencing an innocent person to life, and death, in ecological collapse.

Reasons given : I’d like to achieve a sense of immortality.

Real reasons : Fear of death and non-existence.

Suggested alternatives : Accept mortality. Spread memes not genes. Socrates’ heirs are not apparent, but his ideas linger strong.

Reasons given : My biological clock has gone off.

Real reasons : Women’s normal heightened sexual desire in 30s & 40s difficult to accept in puritanical societies.

Suggested alternatives : Disarm that culturally-implanted mental time bomb. It’s okay to make love and not babies.

Reasons given : I don’t know.

Real reasons : Never thought about it. Unthinking conformity.

Suggested alternatives : Think before you breed, and you might not.

Reasons given : I might regret not having had the experience later, when it’s too late.

Real reasons : Fear of future worries and life passing too fast.

Suggested alternatives : We can’t experience everything. Far better to regret not breeding than to regret breeding

Reasons given : I do not want to deny my kids (who do not exist yet) the joy of existence.

Real reasons : Ignoring lack of joy in existing children.

Suggested alternatives : Promote existence of joy rather than imagining joy in mere existence.

Reasons given : Procreation has traditionally been a source of personal empowerment for women.

Real reasons : Feels powerless. Desires power and respect society appears to give to mothers and withholds from others.

Suggested alternatives : Mothers get more lip service than respect. Picking up family’s slack is not empowering. Seek self-defined sources of power.